Cigarette Lighter Purchase - not until you are 30!

The humble Cigarette Lighter

I drove to our nearby town today and stopped in at the Dollar Store to purchase a bottle of furniture oil as I oiled two outside wooded steps before I ran out and liked the results instead of staining or painting them, but this could be another topic for a blog eh!

They did not have any, so the next thing was to purchase a couple of smoke alarm batteries and cigarette lighters - it is still BBQ weather and beside I also smoke and roll my own!, but seriously considering buying a supply of these..as I am totally addicted to having something in my mouth and/or in my hand - I also bite my nails since I can remember, so it is not necessarily the addiction of nicotine that I crave (smokers will more than likely understand what I mean). Chewing gum just does not work very well either as it is a totally different action or participation to smoking.

I took the items up to the check out counter and the cashier rang up the batteries then asked if I was over 30 years old and looked at up at me and decided that I was. She informed me that between 18 and 30 they could decide whether they would sell to people or not..

I was quite astonished and queried why there was an age limit to buying lighters? Well, the long and short of this - Apparently there must be a lot of pyromaniacs and or firebugs around these ages!! There was a young adult male standing behind me at least 21 years perhaps 23, with his purchase and I turned to him and jokingly said to him 'sorry, you cannot buy lighters as you do not look like you are 30. What do you think about this shop and others thinking you could be a pyromaniac and not responsible enough to buy lighters?

He just gave me a sheepish grin and did not say anything at all to my question,
or appear to even understand or comprehend that one of his basic rights of an adult, had been refused him, all due to some other reckless, irresponsible people between the ages of 30 and under had done, and now he was paying the piper!!

Am I one of only a few who see the ridiculousness of this situation and also the horror that we have given and are giving up what we were given in the first place, to powers-that-be who think they know better than we do what is good for us?? The innocent are being proven guilty, while the guilty go free and the rules have to be changed because of their actions?

Well, you know as I see it.... Why the heck is the burden of responsibility upon the general public (You and me) and anywhere that the public goes to e.g. shops, garages, schools etc.. Have we become everyone else's keeper and baby sitters that no one takes responsibility for their own actions or parents take responsibility for their own children? Teaching their children what is right from wrong and learning that every action has a consequence - good or bad? Apparently not!

Parents do not even discipline their children, by standing firm with them - Meaning No, when they say No and there should not be any arguments about it..these parents are too scared to stand up to their children because the child screams and has a tantrum in the middle of Walmart or where-ever and embarrasses the parent that they give in..Whoop-de-do, so you get a little red faced as your child is laying on his stomach screaming at the top of his lungs and banging his fists on the floor - Get over it as many of us have been there and done that. I had to deal with my own son when he was little. This is what I did,
Ignored him, walk a little away from his tantrum and hid on the corner, keeping an eye on him but out of his sight - see how long he has his tantrum for.. not long once his audience, me (parent) has left the scene.

However, the children are parenting the parents because the parents are too frightened of embarrassment or even repercussions from other people who stick their noses in. The 'other people' are some of the worst, because they don't 'Walk the walk, nor talk the talk' they are quick to point the finger but are slow to give assistance or advice or understanding and support to give the parent encouragement.

Then there are threats from their own children saying they will tell their teachers, the Police or the Child Services etc because they have had it 'put in their ear' by these same authorities to say it! When their parents do try to stand firm and discipline like they should. Discipline does not necessarily mean smacking a child either, but many could do with a good swat on their backsides!! which is not abuse either. Abuse is such a totally different action upon a child, elderly or person and there is no mistake what abuse is and it does not come under 'discipline' either. Many times these authority figures have no business or real proof that abuse has taken place

We seem to have become a society of blaming other people and complaining 'It's not my fault'!
Everyone wants what is available and demand their rights to own, use, purchase etc, whatever they want, yet it is over half of these same people whom sit back and expect 'society', 'Government' or 'someone' to be the responsible groups who shoulder their burdens, so they don't have to do it and can sit back then protest because their children, public around them are not taking up their slack.

How long are we going to keep 'turning a blind eye, and deaf ear' to our God given Freedom of will? As long as we are abiding by God's law we are still in His GRACE. Yet each and everyday we seem to loose more of this ground that we were all given and are letting 'other people' then 'authorities' to dictate to us how we should be living, where we can shop, what age we can buy after attaining the age of 21 years which has been for many prior years been the age of Adulthood and consent? These authorities are very quick to give the vote to 'teenagers' at 18, and enlist in the Army and go to war on our behalf but they are not permitted to drink alcohol or in many cases buy cigarettes or buy a Lighter for the wood fire, BBQ, burn the paper in the incinerator/burn bin etc etc!!.



Amanda Martin-Shaver ©
20 August 2010

Store Cards

My husband and I decided we would shop at a new (to us) grocery store
called Bi Lo. We had seen several Big-rig trucks with their logo on
and wondered whether they were any cheaper than other grocery stores.
We did find some bulk meat which we bought and thought this was a
good bargain and with our other items in the cart went up to the
check out.

I asked the cashier at the time of him scanning if they had a store
card, he seemed to ignore me or not heard so I waited and when he
finished I asked again and his packing assistant (young woman) said
I was to go down the back and I could get one.

Strange to me as other grocery store had their applications under
the counter and would scan the card right there and then. You did
not even have to fill it out if you did not want to.

I followed the young woman to the desk and she pulled out the
application and asked me my name. I gave her my first name, she
wanted my surname, address, phone number and other information..??

What!!? Or no you don't. I asked was Bi Lo a membership store
whereby I had to pay a membership fee? No it wasn't, it was free
to get, but their store policy was to get all information on their
application before they gave their customers a store card to receive
the discounts.. How can they do that?

I informed her, that the reason applications were filled out, were
not to get discounts but to sell our name, address, phone number
information purely to sell to Marketers, email, phone lists etc
so they could call us with their business ventures. How else do
you think we get these Telemarketers etc calling us out of the
blue - Our information was sold. - It is a 'sneaky' method to
hoodwink unsuspecting people into giving their information, purely
to be sold to others as a profit!! If that doesn't 'get your
dander up just a little' nothing will!

My name is worth a lot to me and I do not appreciate it being sold
to other people without my knowledge of what anyone is going to do
with it, nor get the money they sell it for in the first place!!

All the grocery stores I have purchased from regularly across the
USA who have had store cards have not expected me to fill our their
applications, it has been purely voluntarily. I declined to fill
this one out.

When one thinks about these store cards, it is purely incentive
for their customers to buy more when they see discounted items on
the price tags so they buy more than what was on their list.

Customers should be able to buy these same products whether they use
a Store Card or not, it is all Hype that the general public has been
'programed' into accepting.

I did not give her my information and said I would not be shopping
at Bi Lo again with their Card store policy - there are many other
grocery stores I can pick and choose from.

I believe we have to guard our sensitive information and be prudent
with whom we give to and for the right reasons they need it. So
many people give this information without any real forethought who
is getting the information and what it will be used for.

Amanda

Vehicle insurance quotes

Through a survey site I was sent to a website for insurance quotes
so I thought, why not, I need to be looking to renew our insurance
on our vehicle before it expires next month.

I fill out the form, I cannot leave a cell phone number as I do not
own one, nor do I want one or need one. - enough said on this for
now! The good old land line is good enough for me!!

Not long after I finish filling out the form and sending onwards into
cyber space I received a call and spoke with a nice sounding guy.

Well I reckon all these customer service / sellers etc all seem to
think we will all jump on the band wagon and give out all our sensitive
information without any thought and accept all they say..Sorry, not
me. I am done with believing everything someone tells me or their
scare tactics I should do like a mindless zombie.

Have you noticed the stupid questions these employees are required
to ask?? who wrote these questions and why are these employees
saying anything to their employers they are stupid questions?

This guy Q (his family nickname) asks me for my name, address,
DOB etc etc which I had already filled out on the form, and said
so - Oh we just want to make sure you are who you say you are!!
- well who else would I be when you have called the phone number
I gave and you have already inquired if I am Amanda, which is me
upon answering!!

We talked about their different insurance options, benefits,
deductibles and what I could expect from the plan etc etc...I have
not had any claims or accidents in the last 3 years - even longer
but they were only interested in the last 3 years.

I don't drive talking on a cell-phone, or drink beverage or eat, or
put on my make up, or use my knees to hold the steering wheel
while I am doing something with my hands. (I can't multi-task at
the wheel so I don't bother) Nor do I tail-gate and I like several
car lengths in front of me, so I can react in time when so many
drivers give me 2 second warning they are going to turn in front
of me - yet so often I see all these things I mention from other
drivers and my space I make between the car in front and
myself suddenly disappear because someone decides they
want to be in there and causes me to brake to let them in!!

How many of us hear another driver say "I have never had an
accident?" yet you see them doing some or all of these multi-
tasking while driving and wonder 'how many accidents did they
cause'??

I only drive about once per week to town to do my errands over a
normal period of time, so I am not racking up the miles in a usual
week. However, the many scratches and small dents on the sides
of my pickup from shopping carts or doors being opened against
the side of my vehicle from thoughtless drivers or passengers,
could give the impression of a different story. Yet I know our
vehicle is not the only one that has these marks.

He then asks me for my Social security number so I could get
a better deal than quoted depending on my credit score and
he said that he has given me the best prices from dozens of
insurance companies and he could start me right off now as
these quotes change within minutes and go up!!

What rot... what kind of fool does he think I am?? If all these
dozens of insurance companies are vying for my membership
then why in the world would they be putting their prices up as
we speak??

Also why would insurance companies want with my SSN and
credit score,my credit is not the issue here, but my driving
record is.

Funny how, when you point these things out to them, they seem
to stop in mid verbatim and try and come up with the answer
which does not sound very convincing to me why they need this
information.

Well the long and short of this exercise, I will be changing our
insurance but not because I have been told I should be doing it
right now before the prices go up but when I am good and ready
and not before.

Aren't you also tired of these lame excuses and brow-beating
spiels of getting our business.

Amanda

Truckers Wife

The life of a truckers wife can be lonely and filled with uncertainty and worry.
When James first started truck driving for Werner's Enterprise, Omaha Nebraska being their Head Office. We were living in Oregon and he paid to go to IITR Driving School in Creswell, Oregon for the six week course. We borrowed money off my Ford Escort car.

Upon completion he was offered a driving position with two companies. Gordon's Transport and Werner's. James opted to go with Gordon's as they were offering designated runs which James wanted to do so he would be home more often than over the road driving. He would attend Gordon's orientation course and received their letter and bus ticket to travel up to Portland, Oregon on Sunday and be ready to start orientation on Monday.

He packed his bag and we drove to the bus station and he left, arriving and being met by a shuttle to his hotel. He arrived next morning at the venue for orientation to discover he was a day late and they were sending him home with a return ticket. James tried to point out from his letter the dates and times they had written down, the mistake was theirs - he had proof, and still they would not budge. James was late and that was that!

James called me and I immediately called IITR and spoke with the Manager who tried to intervene on our behalf as they also had a copy of the letter as Gordon's invitation to drivers had come through them. Gordon's staff would still not budge.

James had to accept Werner's whom did not have any Net Op openings in our area and also at that time still had a very good name and reputation. (they have been loosing their good name in the years that James worked for them, with many drivers quitting) He drove OTR with his trainer for 6 weeks, then got his own truck and solo drove for the first year.

In October he found Shadow at a Truck Stop who had either been dumped or run away from his owner (probably the later as he ran away from us after having him 2 years) and he loved being companion on the truck

James requested to drive Net Ops anywhere there was a vacancy, we were tired of living in a Manufactured Home Park with their rules and regulations. The nearest vacancy was in Cheyenne, Wyoming, so he accepted, I gave my notice to University of Oregon, we sold the single wide, and my Ford Escort. Packed up and loaded a Uhaul medum truck, with trailer on the back with the Ford Ranger and left for Wyoming, following James who was hauling a load in his bigrig in January.
We had bought 35 acres of land about 20 miles from Laramie and thought we may put a house on the property, however it was too far away from Cheyenne and we did not live there.

It took us 3 days and nights to get there, plus a change in time zone from Pacific to Mountain one hour ahead. We slept in the bigrig when James ran out of hours. Driving 11 hours days in a Uhaul truck with the pickup and trailer behind on very unfamilar roads was no mean fete especially a Kiwi and never driving further than my town up to Auckland which took around 3 hours was a huge challenge. I had to drive some very scary snowy/icy roads that I was not used to at all. However I survived the trip

We rented a double wide in a Park but was not so strict with their rules and we could have our two dogs. They were not ready for us as they said the previous tenants had left the place in a mess and was real dirty so they put us up in a motel for the night. However when we arrived the Manager was still cleaning although he had not really made much headway from my point of view and I needed to clean before I could bring our stuff in and put away in the cupboards. I cleaned all next day the walls, ceilings, light fixtures and floors etc

Two days later James and I took a drive north several miles past Laramie and on our way back along I75 freeway.. Photos of our wreck and rest of the story Here

Well, we are vehicleless and out of pocket, because we discover the insurance on our pickup expired on the 26 December. Our 'bozo' agent failed to configure his computer to take out payments from our bank account and he had missed December. The insurance office was on the same floor and building as our Selco Credit Union. He had also missed October and fortunately we discovered this and went in person to tell him.

After many exhaustive and fruitile phone calls, emails and letters back and forth to Selco Credit Union they paid off the loan we had outstanding very quickly but this did not cover the insurance. Over 2 years of trying we were never able to resolve the agents error (who had left their employ and also his manager whom we spoke to left) with our policy payments and never got reimbused. We had to eat this and move on.

We bought a 2nd hand beat up Cherokee that we were scared to leave Cheyenne over any distance in case it broke down, however it didn't and served us until we got to Nebraska

James drove from Cheyenne to Rock Springs about 250 miles one way and back 5 days per week, many times after I could sit long enough I came for the ride and learn to drive the bigrig (shoosh, I don't have an CDL license). For six months, with the ocassional run from Cheyenne to North Platt in Nebraska which was flatter run.

There was an ocassion that James and I had to sleep overnight in Laramie in the truck, fortunately this route James was issued with the Bigrig sleeper as the road from Laramie to Cheyenne was closed due to heavy snow and ice. There were other times that we got home late due to the weather or got a late start.

An opening came up and James requested to take the Cheyenne to North Platt with a time zone change of one hour into Central time about an hour from North Platt. He drove that for the next 6 months, with me almost his constant companion - riding shotgun..

We lived in Cheyenne for a year and did some extensive searching and had a couple of Real Estate agents sending us likely homes and land for sale around Nebraska in our price range (as it was greener than Wyoming which I did not like) We bought our first home, with only photos to view. Not the best recommendation to buy homes on, and will not do again! Cheyenne was knee deep in snow in the winter. Can you believe it? I said to James I would follow him anywhere except I did not want to be 'knee deep' in snow - yet here I was in Wyoming knee deep AND I swept the snow off the front porch - yes I did say swept.. Who would have guessed I would be sweeping snow with a house broom, unheard of back in NZ as the snow around my neck of the woods when it did snow was far too wet and mostly did not settle on concrete, or the roads. I always thought snow was snow, but I have since learned there is a variation of snow!!

We packed up again in February and I left the house cleaner than I got it and we hired a Budget Rental truck that were offering a special. Paid cash up front and headed south into Central time zone and taking just one day to arrive. However we had to spend the night at a motel before we could go see the house the next day.

We were a bit shocked to see how dirty the house was left, as this was a real estate sale, so I had to set about cleaning again before I could put anything away. The house was run down yet livable downstairs, upstairs was too hot in summer and too cold in winter as it did not have any insulation. The outside buildings and grounds were also a little run down.

After we unloaded the Budget we called the office in Lincoln to request directions to take the truck back and I drove our car. We spent hours looking for their office and could not find it and it got dark so we had to drive back home again and try next day. We ended up with them taking extra money out because we were late! We were not happy as their instructions to their depot was almost impossible to find and we only stumbled upon it on our way down another road and saw it tucked away. - People need to stop and think that not everyone has 'local knowledge'!!!

The first winter was quite a nightmare as we only had a car in snowy conditions, we traded in the old cherokee for a 'brand new' Isuzu car, James wanted a 2nd hand 4WD but our credit was not good and had been dented (I don't think our credit has ever been unmarked for one thing or another - even when I first got my SSN someone put stuff on there and I am still disputing that it is not mine!) Anyway, he could buy a brand new car to improve our credit rating, but not a 2nd hand pickup!

The grader vehicle had not been down to our driveway as the previous elderly lady whom lived in our home, probably did not go out much and we were the last house on this road, so the road was several feet deep with snow and James often got stuck and either had our neighbour pull him out or he was not able to drive into work because of the road near the bridge was unaccessible even with 4WD.

After a month or so the grader driver got the picture and came down and graded, but it was not until the next winter that they graded on a regular basis and then I began to see other 4WD vehicles drive on the road all year long as it was a short cut to the houses on the fork a quarter of a mile away. - By the second year we had traded in our car for a 4WD which we own outright and still have today.

Well life of a truckers wife ran along with its ups and downs for the next 3 years as James drove the Net Ops dedicated run from Omaha Head Office to Westbranch Iowa. He was home each evening and two days off. I could not go with him as they had a no passenger policy and they would see me. There were several ocassions that James got home late and a couple of those I called his dispatcher as I was worried where he was and if there had been an accident. James broke down many times over the years and in some very isolated areas and it would take hours for anyone to come and tow his truck. He was off for the ocassional day due to bad weather as he had when we lived in Cheyenne and no freight could get through due to the roads being closed etc. However these days were not often and he received $60 per day which helped and better than nothing.

I worked around the house and grounds, painted and changed out screening in windows and doors, repaired some broken windows, put up the electric fence and mended many, many times of the course of months for the two horses we bought as one constantly got out and would often break the connection which I had to find and fix. I put on my winter boots, coat, hat and gloves to just walk down 50 yards to the mailbox wadding in thigh high snow near the bottom of the driveway that first winter. The other winters the driveway never got all this built up snow because of the 4WD kept the snow packed down.

I planted in a vege garden the first summer and not the others as the animals now had free range over the whole 4 acres..Until I had my nasty fall off Tazman and most simple tasks after that has been awkward or just too hard for me to accomplish.

January 2009, James did not drive for a full 8 days, Werners had changed their $60.00 per day down to $20 and also took drivers holiday pay that they would not get any. Story here. James had to quickly change companies and was hired on with Universe Trucking, gave his notice to Werners so he would be in good standing with them and drove OTR again, whereby he was usually only gone a week so it was not too bad for me to get back into. After a couple of months he was driving up to New York and the States up there which was more pay. He was making good money which we socked away to relocate once again. Universe did not use the qualcomm paperless logs which is like a computer inside the truck which tells the dispatchers where the truck is at all times and read milage etc and drivers can communicate from. James had to learn all the different techniques of written logs and tallying up times, different time zones etc which was a whole different ball game.

James did well driving for them and the Safety Manager whom James always spoke with when he came back in was pleased with his driving and dedication however all that changed when James mentioned that we were going to have to relocate out of state to Safety and owner's son whom ran Universe. Universe did not have a depot in any other state so there was no question whether James could still relocate with the company.

Two weeks before James was to finish he asked the owners son if he could keep sending him up to New York so he could make the big money so we would have enough behind us. The owner's father whom was way past retiring often came in to put in his two cents worth and was not very tactful at best was there that day.

The strangest thing, I was waiting out in the pickup for James to come back out with his wages and he said to me "I think I was just fired"! I thought he was joking... James said that the 'old man' upon hearing James request to haul loads up to New York and learning that he was leaving said that James had brought the trailer in with a scratch on it...! and something about his logs had an error but he was not able to go to see Safety and talk about it and get it fixed as this had happened several times before - James had not done anything wrong just an error how he filled out his logs and once explained was able to be amended. The old man said "we could call it quits"!!!!

James and I were both completely confused and astounded and we took out everything from the bigrig. I was going to clean out the truck with soap and water and clean everything down when he came back in on his final day. We had to leave it dirty.

After we packed up and relocated to Georgia to the last time zone of Eastern (I have lived in 4 time zones across the United States) and James went to one of the local big trucking companies he learned that Universe Trucking had placed him in 'log violation' which is a misdomeanor on his DAT files. Talk about mean spirited. Fortunately the time has lapsed and he now has a clean slate again, and the old man has since passed on.

James has driven bigrig truck over one million miles (1,000,000). and a drawer full of Award certificates for his safety, dedication and other positive reinforcements, mostly from Werners as he drove with them the longest so far.

After several applications to driving companies he was hired on with Arnolds Transport after travelling down to Jackson, Florida for orientation and drove over the road being away for about 4 to 6 weeks and home 2 days. Us Express bought them out a few months later even though they still operate under their name, James was offered the opportunity to go Owner lease driver. We gave it a lot of thought and James talked to various owner drivers and decided we would do it. He had to resign from Arnolds, hire on with US Express and travelled to their orientation and see if he would be eligible to be offered a Lease truck which he was, over several hundred other hopeful drivers. US Express was suppose to give James a grace period of 3 weeks before they started to take out lease payments each month - they started straight away.

We have had such small wages that we have had to dip into our reserves Then 6 weeks ago James parked his bigrig at a truck stop not far from our turn off after being home for one night and was inside the shop, it was dark and he jumped back in to the truck and started it up and started to drive forward when he heard an awful whirring and clunking sound, quickly turned the motor off and got out to see all the anti-freeze gushing out onto the parking area. With a flash light he looked under the hood and saw that several of the fan blades had been sheered off, so then he looked around the grill and saw some small dents and a couple of splits. Some driver had backed into his grill and pushed the radiator back against the fan. He called me and I had to come and get him after calling dispatcher whom said they would send a tow truck out next day. When we got back next day we were able to see more of the damage. We took numerous photos and the truck was towed away and he was home for a week without work or wages coming in.

We had to drive up to Atlanta to pick up his bigrig which was not where they said it was but actually several miles away at their Atlanta depot - communication needs to be better with all truck companies to their drivers for better production!

Since he started back driving again he stopped home one night and each week he has had a breakdown of some sort that has resulted from that 'sneaky driver' who backed into him and took off without a word. He has received no wages in 5 weeks as they are taking what he earns to pay back the lease on the truck as well as the $1,000.00 deductable for insurance. Who in their right mind would pay their employer to be employed?? James, my dedicated and loyal working husband, that's who..And that is what I mentioned to his supervisor when I was talking with him. He received a small wage last week of $256.00 which did not even meet our rent.

I have the Electricty company threatening to shut off the power, Windstream has cut off the dish network and will be cutting off phone and internet service, James verizon phone service is overdue which he needs to call dispatcher, yet US Express does not pay for the service they require their drivers to have and we still owe on our rent. The dogs are getting low in food.

My children have offered to come to the rescue, Kerie tried to send me money via Paypal which she deposited her tax return in. As she is working in France on a working holiday she was not able to put her New Zealand bank details on there so she could pay her NZ credit card. When she called Paypal they said she had to be in England to do this being a Commonwealth country like our own I guess. This makes me mad that Paypal will accept money deposited into your account quick enough yet will not allow you to send money to another members account unless you have banking details typed in. Isn't it our money???

So my son Daryl, who is working on the Continent tried to send me money from his Wells-Fargo account and he could not do this either... What the heck is wrong with our banking system that we cannot send or transfer money from bank to bank. - I have now seen two small deposits under 20 cent sent to our bank from Daryl's as a test, I am still waiting for his main deposit to come through which Daryl says has gone through his end.

America, you need to get with the program, New Zealand and Australia are 'light years' ahead of you in these areas. We can actually nominate any day of the week to pay a bill, transfer etc etc not choose from a small selection of dates. Don't you realise that all you have to do is re-configure your computers and they can do anything you ask of them???

Well it is Wednesday and all last week and this week I have been real scared as to what we will do if US Express does not come through and pay James a decent wage, he has been driving long hours and miles but each week has still had a break down which has cost time and loss of hours.

My faith in the Lord has taken a big nose dive as I have really believed He would not let us get into this big mess whereby I could be homeless, without power by next week. The bible says we are not to worry as the birds don't worry about food and he sees every sparrow fall to the ground and we (humans) are suppose to be more precious to Him that birds and animals. Our dogs have never had to go hungry, I would never ignore my children yet here I sit scared and wondering why the Lord Jesus has not answered our prayers.
More when I know more...
6 May, I spent several hours on the phone with James then his dispatcher, payroll, then trying to go up the chain of command to his supervisor's supervisor whom I did speak with and was able to tell them our situation. They have promised to look into these 'what I think' is an exhorbant amount of money taken away that we do not get any wages at all and try and crunch numbers to spread out over a longer period of time and smaller amount taken. I did receive responses back to my initial call which I thank them for as so many people these days ignore you. I am told that they are able to stretch out payments and we should get something in our bank tomorrow and hopefully Daryl's transfer will be there too and I can finally pay our overdue utilities and get back into current statis at the very least.
I think, finally the Lord heard me, I am much more calmer and composed than the mess I was in earlier today, however I am not taking Jesus off the 'hot seat' at present because He should not have let this go on for so long, especially when I have been praying all along and not left our dilemma until the last moment.

Amanda Martin-Shaver ©
6 May 2010

Family, Do we need them?

Family, Do we need them?

I received email note from my big sis
excited to see her name I opened quickly
my excitement soon turned to 'what's this'?
a terse note "please take me off your undisclosed list"

not a thank you, I enjoy hearing from you
or, do not send photos cause they take to long to come through
"I am on dial up and I am not computer literate
I have no end of problems that I don't know how to fix it.

they are causing problems, goes off line before they show"
..The last time I saw or talked to her was 9 years ago
nothing about what has been happening in her neck of the woods
put a real damper on my first correspondence since childhood

I was just keeping my family updated
I did think she would hate this
she does not write so I do not know how she is
just a terse note to take her off my list!

So, What do I make of this email?
that she does not have any time for me
I hear from one sibling out of three
It was Mum who was the glue of our family

I thought blood was thinker than water
I am almost young enough to be her daughter
yet she has not been much of mentor
we never shared anything like sisters

I had always hoped that we would grow closer
as I got older we would find something in common
we both love and being around our horses
any conversation I started all too soon ceased

It is not as if I have not tried
or let it get to me, for long after I cried
in lines of communication open she is opposed
but alas I have to take her off, I suppose

I guess some siblings will never be friends
even the same blood flowing through our veins
does not make one a close family ally
so what is she to me now, just a blood relly?

Yes I am hurting and I am mad as hell
but I am resilient so I will put up my shell
give it to the Lord so He can take this pain
and tomorrow I will be all smiles again

Amanda Martin-Shaver ©
13 May 2009

Working in America

Working in America

It was such a culture shock to work in the States
so far behind with their policies, they are not up to date
you are on your feet for hours. break time when you sit down
no wonder so many workers look drawn and wearing a frown

I remember working in these conditions in NZ back in the 70s
when my bosses were still in the mindset of the 'old school'
it was tolerable because we received good staff discounts
it was worth it and you were informed of the rules

Here, no one really wants to assist the new member to fit in
they make it harder and do not tell you where you can fall in
I guess you have to be a mind reader and know what to do
because no one is going to help, make a mistake and there is a to-do

Now, as I see it, supervisors do not require you to think
because if you did, then they see you as a direct threat
You could replace them, then where would that leave them?
why out of a job and searching the situations vacant

You cannot expect to get paid for what you are worth
they will only pay you, whom they can replace you first
Corporate America, leading business what I have been told
all Mom and Pops stores have been put out in the cold

One week's paid vacation, if you are lucky
paid on your yearly anniversary, now isn't that ducky?
you have to save your wage's for months to take that well earned break
Just so you can take your family to have fun down on the lake

Many employers do not give you health insurance
nor do they have a retirement fund in place
so many couples have to work to make ends meet
putting their children into day care centers, isn't that great?

So you work like a beaver all the years long
so you can put your children through college
so they can have the opportunities that you did not have
with their cell-phones, ipods, games, clothing, and latest fads

Amanda Martin-Shaver ©
11 May 2009

Chyna, Goodbye

All good and bad things must come to an end
so we say goodbye to our dear friend
we had you since you were six month old
but you had to get out, you couldn't be told

you were our Houdini, nothing was too hard
why did you have to escape, was it for a laugh?
I put you inside an electric fence
you slipped on through, it had no defense

It was not enough to get out, you had to take your sister
in the freezing snow we had to go and get you
lead you back through the neighbours land
or drive miles around the road lead you in hand

we put in a gateway and gave you more room
you were happy for awhile yet all too soon
you were out again and cut your leg real bad
you could have bled to death and made your Papa sad

We thought you would be happy with us for a long time
you are of such amiable nature, taking everything in stride
your papa had hoped you would both go for a ride
we waited until you were older so your bones were strong

All winter long this year you stayed inside
you did not even look, attempt to even try
yet as soon spring came, you were out again
until a neighbour called me up to complain

a very hard decision about you had to be made
we could not keep you anymore your bed was made
we put you up for sale and soon you were bought
and today you left on the trailer, going to the north

Papa could not be here to see you on your way
he could not bare to be around to give you a wave
he loves you, so don't forget to remember me
Goodbye dear friend, the month you turned three

At your new home their fences are sturdier and I think you will stay put
with your new owner who loved you on her first look
new playmates and new lessons, being ridden daily
you'll love it and I know you'll do dandy

Papa and I will come and visit you real soon
see how you are doing, and what you have learned
I know you miss Harmony as she misses you
I will tend her more daily so she will not be blue

Amanda Martin-Shaver ©
9 May 2009